The Changing Face of Marriage

Family life is full of major and minor crises — the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce — and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It’s difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul. — Thomas Moore 

 

As the composition of marriage and families continue to change in the twenty-first century, we are reminded of the call from the second Vatican Council:

"The Council further recognized the dignity of marriage by declaring that families were genuinely “Church.” The Council restored the ancient concept of “domestic church” as it declared: “In what might be regarded as the domestic church, the parents are to be the first preachers of the faith for their children by word and example” (Dogmatic Constitution on the Church, Lumen Gentium, #11).

The early Church began in house churches, where families were the heart of the communities and from which ministers were first called to use their personal gifts to serve the needs of the larger community. The family is the most intimate experience of Church, the place where love, forgiveness and trust should first be encountered. This is the family Church, whose members are called to embody Christ in everyday life. (http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/VAT/aq1004.asp)"

What has been your experience of the 'domestic church'?  Based on what you've experienced in your own life or seen on television/films, what are some pros/cons of the changing structure and composition of marriage and family?  Finally, some good news- a study of marriage and college degree done by the Pew Trust in 2010 suggested that those with a college degree are less likely to experience divorce and multiple marriages than those without a college degree.  Read more here .

What does that mean for you?  Do you feel compelled to someday establish the domestic church in your home?   

Some Say Love...

Bette Midler's famous song 'The Rose' compares love to a flower, a river, a razor and a hunger.  Love is the topic of many songs, in an attempt to illustrate the emotions and feelings that are evoked when someone is in 'love'.  Oftentimes, stories of heartache and/or unrequited love are lamented... other times the joys of passion and unconditional love are celebrated... seeking one's soulmate is the ideal in some songs, while others encourage finding a fun 'for-now' partner.   
In the Christian world, the ideal love of Agape describes a selfless love that is concerned entirely with the well-being of the other.  This counters our American cultural philosophy of 'me-first', and requires a level of vulnerability and trust that many people fear.  And yet, in its ideal manifestation, agapic love can be fulfilling, exhilarating and sustainable in a loving relationship.  Many sappy love songs describe finding your soul mate, the 'one' who is perfect for you, but many wonder if a person really has a 'soul mate' that is the only one they can be happily in relationship with for the rest of their life.  Please read this article on finding one's 'soul mate' and the weakness that may lie in that search and the assumptions/expectations that go along with it. 
As you reflect on some of your favorite songs, consider the messages about love and relationship that are explicitly or implicitly described in the lyrics.  In your blog post, you should include reference to at least 5 songs (the reference can be in the form of direct quote or general summary of the song's message).  Respond to the following prompts in a cohesive reflection-- not in the format of question1:... question 2...
Prompts:
What are the qualities and characteristics of love that you seek to experience in dating/committed relationships?  Where do you see these illustrated in music?  Do you believe in the quest for soul mates as described in the article?  Why/why not?

Gender and Dating Relationships

In our society, gender stereotypes are often reinforced in romantic relationships.  Please read this article on the role of gender particularly in engagement/proposal scenarios.  I found one reader's response particularly provocative as well:  Andy, thanks for your thoughtful reflections on the tired traditions of engagements and weddings. I couldn’t help but notice that you focus a lot on how women’s expectations play into these harmful expectations. But it doesn’t quite seem fair to place the burden of the harmful tradition on women alone. Do you have any thoughts about how men’s own expectations (as providers, for instance) play into the traditions as well?

What is your response to both the article and the reader's questions?  How does this compare to your families' experiences and your love story project?  

Dating: What's the Point?

In chapter five of his book "Love, Reason, and God's Story", David Cloutier examines arguments within Christianity in favor of dating and opposed to the practice of dating.  Some of the 'anti-daters' argue that dating in our current social context is 'essentially practice for divorce'.  Please read the first section of Chapter 5 (111-119).  In your response, share your reaction to this claim, as well as your reaction to the reasons given to justify dating (those by Freitas and King among others).  How does this argument compare with the experience of you/your peers and 'contemporaries'?  Finally, how does this compare to the 'hook-up' culture prevalent in high schools, colleges and universities in 2013?

Little Women

As you have read and watched in the documentary Misrepresentation, women are objectified and sexualized, often at a very young age.  What are you reactions to what you have read and watched?  As a young woman, how do you imagine/anticipate (or currently experience) the role that your gender will play in the workplace?  How has attending the Mount affected your understanding of your gender and identity?

Sources of your Identity

As we begin our course in Vocations and Human Sexuality, a starting point is to consider the various sources that have informed and developed your identity.  Your task is as follows:

Write a three paragraph blog post that explains three specific factors that have affected your identity.  They might include: family members, friends, a specific experience, music, faith, television or movies, travel, etc.

In each paragraph, explain how the factor has affected you and what you've learned about yourself as a result.  Additionally, create a link to a website or embed a picture that is relevant for each paragraph.  For the sake of practice, please embed at least one website and one photo.

Example:

I remember the feeling when I walked onto the campus at Saint Joseph's University for the first time.  It was February of my junior year of high school, and my mom and I had traveled down the east coast on a college tour during school vacation week.  It was an unseasonably warm day in Philadelphia so throughout the campus, students sat on the grass, played frisbee and wandered around.  It was like I'd walked into one of the school's promotional pamphlets I'd received in the mail.  It was idyllic, and I instantly knew this was where I wanted to spend my four years of college.  Not only was the setting beautiful, but each person I met on that trip was warm and welcoming.  From the people at the hotel on City Line Avenue (today a Target... then the Adam's Mark), to my tour guide, and the teacher whose class I observed, I felt like I was home.  That realization, along with the following four years of college, have formed who I am today.  Saint Joe's sparked my passion for theology and service and challenged me to spend my life discerning how to incorporate that passion into who I am becoming (still today!).

Mission

Based on our class discussion and activity around mission statements, please post your own mission statement.  Using this link as inspiration (and you are welcome to do your own research, as well), formulate a 7 sentence (minimum) mission statement.  Your mission statement should describe your passions in life, what is important to you and who you are.  Have fun!  Get inspired!